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Neon Genesis Evanclockeon Neon Genesis Evanclockeon

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

Shinji is a blasphemous parody of all that is man

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AnkhClock responds:

He once shot down a massive alien using a sniper rifle powered by all the electricity in Japan. That was awesome.

Pass The Ca$h II Pass The Ca$h II

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

The only collab with zero plot inconsistencies.

OTB - The Clock Crew OTB - The Clock Crew

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

Haha I get it: MARK. TWAIN. Oh man, boat jokes. They keel me.

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Cometh the Hour Cometh the Hour

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014


RobertClock responds:

i used basically this plot, and EXACTLY the same punchline back in 2011. but shhhh don't tell anyone.

Clock Crew: Secret Origin Clock Crew: Secret Origin

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

I am a computer.

Funk Ar0und:Green Banana Funk Ar0und:Green Banana

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

gettin' funky in here

AbsintheClock responds:

Roll down the windows and gimme some air.

CLOCK DAY 2014: procastin CLOCK DAY 2014: procastin

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

I smiled at the "Clockday the 13th" joke.

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chris-the-stick2 responds:

i am glad that my movie made you smile.
have a great clockday, corpsegrinder-clock!
you rock!1

Of Clocken Bondage Of Clocken Bondage

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

I see someone other than I abuses Marche fun├Ębre de Siegfried for its badass dramatic horn.

Fived and favorited.

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Glow-in-the-Dark Clock! Glow-in-the-Dark Clock!

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 15, 2014

Damn, didn't have my volume up loud enough. Now I can only wonder what might have been.

DurianClock responds:

Miss you bae! <3

Mark Of Darkness Mark Of Darkness

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars August 8, 2014

So where to begin...let's get the negatives out of the way.

The test at the beginning could not have been more bizarrely wrong. "I fight with strength and endurance, wade into battle cutting enemies in half, prefer to be in the front lines, my enemies are crushed beneath my big stompy boot..." "You are an Assassin!" "...okay I like stabbing people in the back in the night." "Oh why didn't you say so? You're an Archer!" "..."

Everything was very nice looking...except the walk cycle, which looked very bizarre. He looked like he was moonwalking wherever he went. Also, I have no idea why the dark golem was the only recolored version of an existing creature. Seems like every other creature in the game was unique, I don't really get why that would have been one texture too many?

Once you got out of the second zone, everything else felt unnecessary, like you're just doing stuff for the hell of it. What's more, it got grindy as all hell. The golem dust mission was bad enough, but the wolves and titans were somehow even worse because a good half of it was traipsing up and down the same bloody set of stairs hitting the same respawns to whittle down their mountains of health.

The promotion of the "premium" rewards was kind of obnoxious too. Yeah, you could get premium stuff...but why? The game is way too short to enjoy them thoroughly, and way too easy already.

There were definitely satisfying moments, to be sure. Getting the giant axe was the highlight--unfortunately, no other weapon the rest of the game was as cool-looking, and it was quickly obsolete. I liked fighting the orc invasion force, that was where the game really came alive.

All-in-all, functional, nice-looking, had a good amount of stuff, but it felt like it was trying to be a MMORPG-type experience, and squeeze a little bit of MMORPG-type real-life money for already abundant gold and uninteresting items for a game that isn't long enough for them to be worthwhile.

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